ALL KINDS OF WRONG AT BARNES & NOBLE

It would have been easy to miss it. My beloved new Mrs stopped dead in her tracks and began to stare at a book display with all the horror normally reserved for a woman who comes home to discover her husband enthusiastically fellating a muscle bound Eastern European man called Serge.

What was it that filled her with such dismay?

It was the above book, spotted on the shelves of a local Barnes & Noble as we wandered around perusing the cookery books. With my background in publishing, I of all people know that there appear to be books on just about every aspect of cooking these days. But, there are so many levels of wrong with "Vegan Cupcakes:Take Over The World" that it is actually quite hard to know where to begin. Let's start with the cover which promises "75 Dairy Free Recipes For Cupcakes that Rule"

FFS.

Anyone who reads the blog with any regularity will know that neither HP nor I have much truck with vegetarianism let alone veganism, but we are both happy to let those who do follow these odd little cults well alone as long as they refrain from thrusting pamphlets in our faces and promise not to frighten the children.

However, now they have added cupcakes, another of my least favourite foods, to the mix making possible the most horrific sounding combination since the day Mr Milli met Mr Vanilli. By the name of all that is holy, something has to be done. Someone has to make a stand or these folks really will take over the world.

Sybil and I ran home as fast as we could and decided to draw our own line in the sand. Well, in fact, we decided to suck down 1lb of my baked crisp chicken wings and a large dairy filled slice of terrific Banana Shortbread from Valerie's Confections. It was a small step, but the first salvo in our personal war against those who would seek to suck every last ounce of joy out of the food we eat.

Will you join us?